最简单的英语笑话 关于英语笑话的小短文.docxVIP

最简单的英语笑话 关于英语笑话的小短文 Three famous surgeons were bragging about(吹嘘，炫耀) their skills. "A man came to me who had his hand cut off," said one. "Today that man is a concert violinist(小提琴家) ." "That's nothing," said another. "A guy came to me who had his legs cut off. I stitched(缝纫，装订)them back on, and today that man is a marathon runner." "I can top both of you," said the third. "One day I came on the scene of a terrible accident. There was nothing left but a horse's posterior(后部，臀部) - and a pair of glasses. Today that man is seated in United States Senate." 三个有名的外科医生正在吹嘘他们的技术，“一个人断了一只手，他来找我，”一个说，“如今那个人是个音乐会的小提琴手。” “这算不了什么，”另一个说，“一个家伙两条腿断了，他来找我，我将它们接了回去。如今，那人是马拉松选手。” “我比你们两个都强，”第三个说，“一天，我碰到一起可怕的车祸，除了一个马屁股，和一幅眼睛，什么都没有留下。如今，那人坐在美国参议院里。” One day a boy came to his teacher and said: Teacher, pa wants to know if you like roast(烘烤) pig. I certainly do, said the teacher, and you tell your father he is very kind to think of me. Days passed, and nothing more was said about the roast pig. Finally the teacher said to the boy: I thought your father was going to send me over some roast pig. Yes, said the boy, he did intend to, but the pig got well. 一天有个男孩去对他老师说：老师，我爸想知道你是不是爱吃烤猪肉。 当然啰，老师说，去告诉你父亲，多谢他想着我。 好几天过去了，再没提起烤猪肉的事儿。 最后老师对男孩说：我以为你父亲要给我送点烤猪肉来呢。 是啊，孩子说，他是这么想的，可后来猪又没病了。 If you refuse to marry me, he swore, I shall die. She refused him. Sixty years later, he died. 如果你不答应嫁给我，他发誓，我就要去死。 她拒绝了他。 六十年后，他死了。 One night a hotel caught fire, and the people who were staying in it ran out in their night clothes. Two men stood outside and looked at the fire. Before I came out, said one, I ran into some of the rooms and found a lot of money. People don't think of money when they're afraid. When anyone leaves paper money in a fire, the fire burns it. So I took all the bills that I could find. No one will be poorer because I took them. You don't know my work, said the other. What is your work? I'm a policeman.